Here is my (tongue firmly in cheek) guide to managing a block with a missile silo established on the roof - following the news that the Olympics may have this additional protection:
- Check the buildings insurance. It is unlikely to cover this under the engineering clause. In fact it is unlikely to cover it under any clause.
- Don't let them take it up there in the lift.
- Make sure that the 'No Access To Unauthorised Persons' signs are clear beside the roof access doors and the doors are securely locked (not with a C6 padlock)
- Do not attempt to carry out repairs yourself. Missile launchers need specialist maintenance, they are highly complex.
- Do not press any buttons.
- In the event that missiles are fired it would probably be best to evacuate the building. Stay put policies do not work in retaliatory situations.
- Extend the building's security contract. Ask LOCOG if they will pay the extra.
- Advise residents' in writing that there may be some vibration and excessive noise - possibly during anti-social hours.
- Try not to anger anyone at the scheme excessively. Especially that quiet chap who keeps himself to himself.
- Get your affairs in order.
